if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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