Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Randomize
