OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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