love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Bang-toberfest begins!!
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
