Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
