@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
