OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize