Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
