Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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