belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just threw up on my dentist
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
