I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
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