Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
