mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
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