White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
