i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
