jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Randomize
