i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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