Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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