We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
