she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I just got carded by a ten year old.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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