i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
