I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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