No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize