East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
