Whod you bang
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
