you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I just blew my weed a kiss
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
