thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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