what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize