just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I could fuck to npr.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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