I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
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after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
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So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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