My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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