This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
