I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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