Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
