i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize