i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Pooping to opera.
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