omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize