Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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