You can't motorboat a personality
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
