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• (602): View more from Arizona

  Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?

  (602): View more from Arizona

  no jk, not my room

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.

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• (949): View more from California

  he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"

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• (916): View more from California

  whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door

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• (253): View more from Washington

  If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot

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• (916): View more from California

  Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.

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• (+97): View more from

  Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything

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