lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
