Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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