You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
just found out that she named her cat after me.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize