I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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