i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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