They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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