The maid of honor just puked.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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