that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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