She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Randomize
