Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize