she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
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Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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